Have you ever been in situation where your feet got stepped on and it hurt? I mean the feeling you get when you are at church and the pastor is preaching and all you can do is lift your feet off the floor because he is stepping all over your feet! And you want to say, "Ouch! Get off of my feet!" but you know if you do then everyone will know that it applies to you. Well, today you may say "Ouch! Get off of my feet!"
Life is challenging and sometimes God brings DIFFICULT people into our lives to prune us, build us, grow us, perfect us. I know it is hard to hear but very often these people have characteristics that we also have. Ouch! Yes, it is often the stuff in them that reflects the stuff in us that most gets on our nerve. It is hard to see but even harder to deal with. And all you can say is "Ouch! Get off of my feet!"
Yes, these people make you really look at yourself and say, "Am I like that?" It's a hard pill to swallow, but swallow it we must if we are to ever be better people. Stop saying, "Ouch! Get off of my feet!" and start moving your feet for change. Keep moving towards the best you that you can be. Don't get stuck in having flaws, they make us human. Don't get frsustrated with yourself. Just make some different choices and you will get different outcomes! They may not come immediately, but they will come. I am living proof of that fact.
Ouch! I know it hurts, but I'm glad I can still feel it. Now I know to move my feet in a different direction. Sometimes it takes the pain to generate change!
For more timeless lessons and endless wisdom, visit http://www.drveronicaglass.com/and purchase your copy of Use Your Buckets: Twelve Life Lessons for Success. This book was featured on The Balancing Act on Lifetime. See the interview by clicking The Balancing Act banner on http://www.drveronicaglass.com/. Share this information with a friend and follow the blog that is changing people's lives by changing their perspectives!
Moving my feet,
Dr. VG
Friday, January 21, 2011
Wednesday, January 19, 2011
Right On Time
In life we are so used to getting things when we want them. I have heard it said that we are a microwave society meaning that we want everything super quick. If it would normally take 3 hours we want it in 1 or less. But the reality is that some things just take time and they happen right on time! Not early, not late, but right on time.
Our challenge is that it may not happen on our time. But who says that our time for things is the RIGHT time for them. I'm just saying...when I look back over my life and examine the times that I thought God was moving too slow because something I wanted to happen hadn't happened by when I wanted it to happen, God's timing was actually perfect and accomplished some things. I mean we've all been in situations where we wanted or needed something to happen that did not happen when we wanted or "thought" we needed it to happen only to discover later that when it happened was actually the perfect time.
Time...chronos and kairos...still time but different concepts. While we are working on chronos God is working in the kairos. Chronos is the physical time while kairos is metaphysical time. One operates in the natural while the other operates in the spiritual. What we have to accept is that God is not limited to physical time because He controls all time. We may not see it manifested in the natural but it is already finished in the spiritual.
So everything that you want and need, God has already responded to in the spiritual. It may not have manifested yet in the physical and it may not ever manifest the way you want it in the physical, but God has already addressed it either way in the spiritual realm. So why worry and stress yourself out over things God has already worked out in the spirit...one way or the other.
I'm not saying don't do your part. I'm not saying when God has told you something not to do the work. I'm not saying that it can't happen, but what I am saying is that God knows exactly what you need and exactly when you need it. Faith is not believing what you see. Faith is believing what you can't see and believing even when it looks like you'll never see.
If it hasn't happened yet, then maybe God is simply giving you the opportunity to show forth your faith. Exercise it a little while. And when it is really time, then God will show up right on time! His timing is perfect! Trust Him.
For more timeless lessons and endless wisdom, visit http://www.drveronicaglass.com/and purchase your copy of Use Your Buckets: Twelve Life Lessons for Success. This book was featured on The Balancing Act on Lifetime. See the interview by clicking The Balancing Act banner on http://www.drveronicaglass.com/. Share this information with a friend and follow the blog that is changing people's lives by changing their perspectives!
Walking in the chronos but trusting in the kairos,
Dr. VG
Our challenge is that it may not happen on our time. But who says that our time for things is the RIGHT time for them. I'm just saying...when I look back over my life and examine the times that I thought God was moving too slow because something I wanted to happen hadn't happened by when I wanted it to happen, God's timing was actually perfect and accomplished some things. I mean we've all been in situations where we wanted or needed something to happen that did not happen when we wanted or "thought" we needed it to happen only to discover later that when it happened was actually the perfect time.
Time...chronos and kairos...still time but different concepts. While we are working on chronos God is working in the kairos. Chronos is the physical time while kairos is metaphysical time. One operates in the natural while the other operates in the spiritual. What we have to accept is that God is not limited to physical time because He controls all time. We may not see it manifested in the natural but it is already finished in the spiritual.
So everything that you want and need, God has already responded to in the spiritual. It may not have manifested yet in the physical and it may not ever manifest the way you want it in the physical, but God has already addressed it either way in the spiritual realm. So why worry and stress yourself out over things God has already worked out in the spirit...one way or the other.
I'm not saying don't do your part. I'm not saying when God has told you something not to do the work. I'm not saying that it can't happen, but what I am saying is that God knows exactly what you need and exactly when you need it. Faith is not believing what you see. Faith is believing what you can't see and believing even when it looks like you'll never see.
If it hasn't happened yet, then maybe God is simply giving you the opportunity to show forth your faith. Exercise it a little while. And when it is really time, then God will show up right on time! His timing is perfect! Trust Him.
For more timeless lessons and endless wisdom, visit http://www.drveronicaglass.com/and purchase your copy of Use Your Buckets: Twelve Life Lessons for Success. This book was featured on The Balancing Act on Lifetime. See the interview by clicking The Balancing Act banner on http://www.drveronicaglass.com/. Share this information with a friend and follow the blog that is changing people's lives by changing their perspectives!
Walking in the chronos but trusting in the kairos,
Dr. VG
Monday, January 17, 2011
Seek and Ye Shall Find
What is it that you are looking for in your life? What I have discovered is that we find what we are looking for in some shape form or fashion. You may be saying to yourself, "Well, I've been looking for a good man and I haven't found one yet." Let me stop you there. Your first error is that you are looking for him instead of looking for HIM. You see the Bible declares that "HE who finds a wife, findeth a good thing." You are trying to do something that is not your job. You are out of position. He has to find you. Men are hunters and they like to hunt. If there is no hunt, they do not see the value. They are not gatherers walking through the garden picking grapes. There is no challenge in that. In other words, you can't be too easy. I'm not saying play games, but what I am saying is recognize your value and don't make it easy for him to obtain you. He should have to go through some things to prove that he wants and to prove that he DESERVES you!
Now I would wager that if you are looking for a GOOD man and not finding him that besides the error of looking you may not know what a GOOD man looks like to recognize him. Some of you are really upset with me but I have to say this. As women we often say we want a good man, but we can't really define what a good man is. Or in the words of one of my male friends, the standard has become so low that a mediocre man looks good and a good man looks great! We usually are simply seeking A MAN preferably one with a job, his own place, and a car, but we're flexible. Flexible to a fault is what I call it. We're so flexible we find ourselves in relationships with and God forbid married to men who on their best day when God is finished with them could not be what and who we need for where we are going. Does that sound familiar?
However, women are not alone in this syndrome. How many men do I personally know who have told me their women woes only for me to realize that they too were settling for less than they deserve. They have women who do not respect them as men, who always have something smart to say, who cuss them out, who demean and belittle them, who don't want to work, who make more money than they do and feel it makes them the boss and the head, who won't cook, clean, or have children, who want to use children to keep them and control them, who look good for everyone else but look a HOT MESS at home, who won't have sex with them (if they are married) but did when they were dating! It sounds like craziness because it is!
So why do we settle? We settle because we don't believe that someone really exists who can meet our needs. Now I want you to understand that no one is perfect and I'm not talking about perfection, but I am talking about compatibility. If you really want to be found by a GOOD MAN, focus on becoming a GOOD WOMAN. If you really want to find a GOOD WOMAN, focus on becoming a GOOD MAN.
The reality is our focus is misplaced. If we work on becoming the best us that we can be, then we will begin to draw people like us into our space. But everyone who is drawn into our space is not there for a romantic or sexual relationship. Some people are drawn into our lives so that we can become more comfortable with characteristics, qualities, and traits, that we are not accustomed to the opposite sex having. They provide a safe place for us to learn to handle people with those qualities that we desire without swooning and losing our minds! Again mediocre seems good and good seems great!
Seek God. Seek You. And when you find God and yourself, all of the rest will fall into place. Begin to do the things that you want to do with your mate by yourself or with a friend. Go to places that you to go with your mate. Start doing it now and get comfortable doing it so that when you go with them you will not be so excited to be doing it that you lose your mind, your morals, or your masculinity. Guys, no REAL woman REALLY wants a man who gives them everything they want and says yes to everything they say. Not really because it gets tired and they begin to not respect you. Just say NO sometimes but not all of the time.
When you seek your best self, you will draw their best self. Start now. Identifying the characteristics you desire in a mate and work on those areas where you find yourself deficient. Position yourself to be found, Ladies, but don't put a for sale and on sale 50% off sign on yourself. Gentlemen, look for a woman who you can take home to mama and to church, but be sure that she has some fire so you want to take her to your home and keep her too! Don't get the good girl and be mad because she's not the bad girl. There really is a middle ground...a lady in the streets, and a firecracker in the sheets.
At the end of the day, if you invest in being your best self and living happily ever now, then if they come or you find them great. But if they don't, then you haven't spent your life waiting for someone else to complete you or give you permission to enjoy life. I'm just saying seek God and yourself and focus on living happily ever NOW and watch how much more enjoyable your life becomes!
For more timeless lessons and endless wisdom, visit http://www.drveronicaglass.com/and purchase your copy of Use Your Buckets: Twelve Life Lessons for Success. This book was featured on The Balancing Act on Lifetime. See the interview by clicking The Balancing Act banner on http://www.drveronicaglass.com/. Share this information with a friend and follow the blog that is changing people's lives by changing their perspectives!
Seeking God and Finding ME,
Dr. VG
Now I would wager that if you are looking for a GOOD man and not finding him that besides the error of looking you may not know what a GOOD man looks like to recognize him. Some of you are really upset with me but I have to say this. As women we often say we want a good man, but we can't really define what a good man is. Or in the words of one of my male friends, the standard has become so low that a mediocre man looks good and a good man looks great! We usually are simply seeking A MAN preferably one with a job, his own place, and a car, but we're flexible. Flexible to a fault is what I call it. We're so flexible we find ourselves in relationships with and God forbid married to men who on their best day when God is finished with them could not be what and who we need for where we are going. Does that sound familiar?
However, women are not alone in this syndrome. How many men do I personally know who have told me their women woes only for me to realize that they too were settling for less than they deserve. They have women who do not respect them as men, who always have something smart to say, who cuss them out, who demean and belittle them, who don't want to work, who make more money than they do and feel it makes them the boss and the head, who won't cook, clean, or have children, who want to use children to keep them and control them, who look good for everyone else but look a HOT MESS at home, who won't have sex with them (if they are married) but did when they were dating! It sounds like craziness because it is!
So why do we settle? We settle because we don't believe that someone really exists who can meet our needs. Now I want you to understand that no one is perfect and I'm not talking about perfection, but I am talking about compatibility. If you really want to be found by a GOOD MAN, focus on becoming a GOOD WOMAN. If you really want to find a GOOD WOMAN, focus on becoming a GOOD MAN.
The reality is our focus is misplaced. If we work on becoming the best us that we can be, then we will begin to draw people like us into our space. But everyone who is drawn into our space is not there for a romantic or sexual relationship. Some people are drawn into our lives so that we can become more comfortable with characteristics, qualities, and traits, that we are not accustomed to the opposite sex having. They provide a safe place for us to learn to handle people with those qualities that we desire without swooning and losing our minds! Again mediocre seems good and good seems great!
Seek God. Seek You. And when you find God and yourself, all of the rest will fall into place. Begin to do the things that you want to do with your mate by yourself or with a friend. Go to places that you to go with your mate. Start doing it now and get comfortable doing it so that when you go with them you will not be so excited to be doing it that you lose your mind, your morals, or your masculinity. Guys, no REAL woman REALLY wants a man who gives them everything they want and says yes to everything they say. Not really because it gets tired and they begin to not respect you. Just say NO sometimes but not all of the time.
When you seek your best self, you will draw their best self. Start now. Identifying the characteristics you desire in a mate and work on those areas where you find yourself deficient. Position yourself to be found, Ladies, but don't put a for sale and on sale 50% off sign on yourself. Gentlemen, look for a woman who you can take home to mama and to church, but be sure that she has some fire so you want to take her to your home and keep her too! Don't get the good girl and be mad because she's not the bad girl. There really is a middle ground...a lady in the streets, and a firecracker in the sheets.
At the end of the day, if you invest in being your best self and living happily ever now, then if they come or you find them great. But if they don't, then you haven't spent your life waiting for someone else to complete you or give you permission to enjoy life. I'm just saying seek God and yourself and focus on living happily ever NOW and watch how much more enjoyable your life becomes!
For more timeless lessons and endless wisdom, visit http://www.drveronicaglass.com/and purchase your copy of Use Your Buckets: Twelve Life Lessons for Success. This book was featured on The Balancing Act on Lifetime. See the interview by clicking The Balancing Act banner on http://www.drveronicaglass.com/. Share this information with a friend and follow the blog that is changing people's lives by changing their perspectives!
Seeking God and Finding ME,
Dr. VG
Friday, January 14, 2011
When Your Bucket is Emptied for You
Sometimes in life things just don't go the way you want them to go. Things that you thought would last are brought to an end and you didn't end it. You decided that you would stick it out and perservere to the very end only to discover that your commitment was not shared. I remember relationships being ended when I didn't want them to be ended. I remember jobs being ended when I didn't want them to be ended. I remember assignments being ended when I didn't want them to be ended. But my bucket was emptied for me and without my permission.
At the time, all I could think was how could this happen to me. How I could I get dumped, let go, released? How could it happen to me? I gave so much of time, talent, self, love, etc.You feel like you wasted it all. But that's not the case. The reality is that often you have been told to empty the bucket but you were too comfortable to do so. When you refuse to empty a bucket that God has told you to empty, then He will empty it for you. He will cause people to end relationships and jobs to end all to get us to where He wants us to be.
Sometimes it just has to happen that way because we won't let it happen any other way. So now it is done. It is over. It is FINISHED! Let it go and move on! Move forward! And know that the bucket had to be emptied one way or another. Rejoice because now your empty bucket is full of possibilities. Explore them. Enjoy them. And move forward with expectation!
For more timeless lessons and endless wisdom, visit http://www.drveronicaglass.com/and purchase your copy of Use Your Buckets: Twelve Life Lessons for Success. This book was featured on The Balancing Act on Lifetime. See the interview by clicking The Balancing Act banner on http://www.drveronicaglass.com/. Share this information with a friend and follow the blog that is changing people's lives by changing their perspectives!
Exploring the Possibilities,
Dr. VG
At the time, all I could think was how could this happen to me. How I could I get dumped, let go, released? How could it happen to me? I gave so much of time, talent, self, love, etc.You feel like you wasted it all. But that's not the case. The reality is that often you have been told to empty the bucket but you were too comfortable to do so. When you refuse to empty a bucket that God has told you to empty, then He will empty it for you. He will cause people to end relationships and jobs to end all to get us to where He wants us to be.
Sometimes it just has to happen that way because we won't let it happen any other way. So now it is done. It is over. It is FINISHED! Let it go and move on! Move forward! And know that the bucket had to be emptied one way or another. Rejoice because now your empty bucket is full of possibilities. Explore them. Enjoy them. And move forward with expectation!
For more timeless lessons and endless wisdom, visit http://www.drveronicaglass.com/and purchase your copy of Use Your Buckets: Twelve Life Lessons for Success. This book was featured on The Balancing Act on Lifetime. See the interview by clicking The Balancing Act banner on http://www.drveronicaglass.com/. Share this information with a friend and follow the blog that is changing people's lives by changing their perspectives!
Exploring the Possibilities,
Dr. VG
Wednesday, January 12, 2011
Walking in Expectation...
Today I am walking in a spirit of expectation. I expect some things to happen today that will blow my mind. Not because I forwarded a text or an email, not because my horoscope said it, not because a prophet told me but simply because God has declared it! We spend so much time seeking "a word" from someone or something when God has given us so many promises that we ought to always walk in expectation.
God declares in His Word, "Behold, I do a new thing. Old things have passed away and all things have become new." Think about that scripture. God says LOOK I do something new and all of that old stuff is done and gone and EVERYTHING has become NEW! Wow! That is something to look at and something I want to see. So let's LOOK at our today and our life...
Today is a new day that can be whatever I need it to be. 2011 is a new year that be whatever I need it to be. I am a new me and I can be whatever I need to be. My circumstances are old things, things of the past but they have become new when my mindset becomes new. With a new mindset, I'm not limited to what I see in the natural about my circumstances, remember, they are just a mirage. The reality lies in what the Word of God declares.
I don't know about you but I am tired of expecting the worst in life, from people, and in situations. I am tired of expecting lack, struggle, and discontent. I am now expecting my life to be what I need it to be which is peaceful, abundant, and joyful! I expect God to provide for me and my family! I expect to have what I need physically, spiritually, and emotionally. Not only that but I am walking in a state of perpetual (constant) expectation.
What is it that you've been afraid to expect? Are you afraid to expect love because it has been so long coming? Are you afraid to expect abundance because you have been conditioned to accept lack? Are you afraid to expect exceedingly and abundantly because you have gotten used to not enough and just enough? Are you afraid to expect excellence because you've grown accustomed to just getting by?
Well, I have good news for you! You can change your expectation! YOU can change your expectation! You CAN change your expectation! You can CHANGE your expectation! You can change YOUR expectation! You can change your EXPECTATION! Regardless of how you say it, you can do it! Repeat it long enough and it will get into your spirit. Once it gets into your spirit, then your behaviors will reflect it. Once your behaviors reflect it, God will use the universe to respond to it.
It all begins with you and your choice. Choose expectation today and watch the universe respond! I expect you to follow this blog and invite your friends to follow it as well!!! Let's see the results!
For more timeless lessons and endless wisdom, visit http://www.drveronicaglass.com/and purchase your copy of Use Your Buckets: Twelve Life Lessons for Success. This book was featured on The Balancing Act on Lifetime. See the interview by clicking The Balancing Act banner on http://www.drveronicaglass.com/. Share this information with a friend and follow the blog that is changing people's lives by changing their perspectives!
Walking Expectantly,
Dr. VG
God declares in His Word, "Behold, I do a new thing. Old things have passed away and all things have become new." Think about that scripture. God says LOOK I do something new and all of that old stuff is done and gone and EVERYTHING has become NEW! Wow! That is something to look at and something I want to see. So let's LOOK at our today and our life...
Today is a new day that can be whatever I need it to be. 2011 is a new year that be whatever I need it to be. I am a new me and I can be whatever I need to be. My circumstances are old things, things of the past but they have become new when my mindset becomes new. With a new mindset, I'm not limited to what I see in the natural about my circumstances, remember, they are just a mirage. The reality lies in what the Word of God declares.
I don't know about you but I am tired of expecting the worst in life, from people, and in situations. I am tired of expecting lack, struggle, and discontent. I am now expecting my life to be what I need it to be which is peaceful, abundant, and joyful! I expect God to provide for me and my family! I expect to have what I need physically, spiritually, and emotionally. Not only that but I am walking in a state of perpetual (constant) expectation.
What is it that you've been afraid to expect? Are you afraid to expect love because it has been so long coming? Are you afraid to expect abundance because you have been conditioned to accept lack? Are you afraid to expect exceedingly and abundantly because you have gotten used to not enough and just enough? Are you afraid to expect excellence because you've grown accustomed to just getting by?
Well, I have good news for you! You can change your expectation! YOU can change your expectation! You CAN change your expectation! You can CHANGE your expectation! You can change YOUR expectation! You can change your EXPECTATION! Regardless of how you say it, you can do it! Repeat it long enough and it will get into your spirit. Once it gets into your spirit, then your behaviors will reflect it. Once your behaviors reflect it, God will use the universe to respond to it.
It all begins with you and your choice. Choose expectation today and watch the universe respond! I expect you to follow this blog and invite your friends to follow it as well!!! Let's see the results!
For more timeless lessons and endless wisdom, visit http://www.drveronicaglass.com/and purchase your copy of Use Your Buckets: Twelve Life Lessons for Success. This book was featured on The Balancing Act on Lifetime. See the interview by clicking The Balancing Act banner on http://www.drveronicaglass.com/. Share this information with a friend and follow the blog that is changing people's lives by changing their perspectives!
Walking Expectantly,
Dr. VG
Tuesday, January 11, 2011
It Had to Happen
So often we look at things that have happened in our lives and want to cry and bemoan our fate. We find ourselves playing the victim because life was unfair to us and we were hurt and our emotions battered and bruised. We lost people, things, money, and hope. But I came to let you know that everything that happened in your life HAD to happen. It had to happen to position you to be where you are for where you are going! It had to happen for you to become who you are on the way to who you are becoming. It simply HAD to happen!
How liberating to know that you don't have to be in bondage to your past. You don't have to hold on to anger and resentment because of the things that have been done to you by others or the things you have done to others. You can forgive them and forgive yourself. You can release the burden that comes with anger, hatred, bitterness, and unforgiveness. You can CHOOSE to release the things that have been holding you down and holding you back from moving forward into your destiny.
This revelation freed me up to release some things that I said I had let go of but in actuality was still holding on to. I had to finally forgive every person who had hurt me in relationships, my parents for their flaws, myself for my choices and my flaws, and God for not doing it the way I wanted HIM to do it. I had to ask forgiveness from some people for having bitterness in my heart towards them regardless of what they had done to me. I had to be the example of truly accepting that it had to happen.
Today, I feel freer, more at ease, more at peace, and more relaxed. The invisible weight that was weighing me down is gone. It is now my job to make sure that it stays gone by forgiving people quickly so that no root of bitterness has time to set up in my heart. True liberty and liberation comes with forgiveness. Today choose to be free and forgive those who have hurt you because the reality is that holding on to the hurt only hurts you. Remember it had to happen!!!!
For more timeless lessons and endless wisdom, visit http://www.drveronicaglass.com/and purchase your copy of Use Your Buckets: Twelve Life Lessons for Success. This book was featured on The Balancing Act on Lifetime. See the interview on national television on January 5th @6 am CST/7am EST. Share this information with a friend and follow the blog that is changing people's lives by changing their perspectives!
Revelling in the Reality,
Dr. VG
How liberating to know that you don't have to be in bondage to your past. You don't have to hold on to anger and resentment because of the things that have been done to you by others or the things you have done to others. You can forgive them and forgive yourself. You can release the burden that comes with anger, hatred, bitterness, and unforgiveness. You can CHOOSE to release the things that have been holding you down and holding you back from moving forward into your destiny.
This revelation freed me up to release some things that I said I had let go of but in actuality was still holding on to. I had to finally forgive every person who had hurt me in relationships, my parents for their flaws, myself for my choices and my flaws, and God for not doing it the way I wanted HIM to do it. I had to ask forgiveness from some people for having bitterness in my heart towards them regardless of what they had done to me. I had to be the example of truly accepting that it had to happen.
Today, I feel freer, more at ease, more at peace, and more relaxed. The invisible weight that was weighing me down is gone. It is now my job to make sure that it stays gone by forgiving people quickly so that no root of bitterness has time to set up in my heart. True liberty and liberation comes with forgiveness. Today choose to be free and forgive those who have hurt you because the reality is that holding on to the hurt only hurts you. Remember it had to happen!!!!
For more timeless lessons and endless wisdom, visit http://www.drveronicaglass.com/and purchase your copy of Use Your Buckets: Twelve Life Lessons for Success. This book was featured on The Balancing Act on Lifetime. See the interview on national television on January 5th @6 am CST/7am EST. Share this information with a friend and follow the blog that is changing people's lives by changing their perspectives!
Revelling in the Reality,
Dr. VG
Tuesday, January 4, 2011
A Change is Gonna Come, Oh Yes It Is!
There was a R&B song by Sam Cooke which was turned into a gospel song by the title "A Change is Gonna Come." Of all of the things I experienced with my fourth ex-husband, one thing that I hold on to was him singing that song. It seemed to touch the very core of my being when he sang those lyrics because he put everything he had into it. It would bring tears to people's eyes and make them stand up because they were holding on to the belief that a change was going to come for THEM! And I believed that a change was going to come for ME! And it did. But it did not come magically. I didn't say hocus pocus. There was no abracadabra. It was a decision and then there was action.
You see, I learned a long time ago that everyone in your life can teach you something. They don't have to get it all right to help you learn lessons. In fact, some of the best and most life-changing lessons that you will ever learn will come from people who got it the most wrong. Sounds crazy, right? But think about it. If your parents really messed up when they were raising you, then you learned what type of parents you didn't want to be. It was through really bad relationships that you learned what you didn't want in a partner,how you didn't want to be treated, and how you didn't want to treat someone else. That in and of itself is half of the battle.
Next, if you are really honest with yourself, there were some things you learned about yourself that YOU needed to change to be better. I can be honest about my flaws and shortcomings and believe me I have had them and still have some but some I have corrected. Listen, when guys try to talk to me I understand some things. First, I understand that they are often drawn by my physical appearance. I may not be Halle Berry but I definitely am not Celie from the Color Purple (no slight to my sister Whoopi). I know that the physical can change. You can gain or lose weight. Your hair can break off or grow long. Or you can suffer from an illness that destroys your physical appearance. If that's why they're with you, then when it changes they will leave you.
So before they get all caught up in my beauty and the booty, I have to let them know some things. I am a mother of seven. I am very active and industrious. I am strong-willed and determined. I can submit to headship but I refuse to submit again to a man whose headship I can not respect. I am spoiled. Yes, I said it. I am spoiled, but I also love to spoil my man. I don't take a long time to make decisions nor to act on my decisions. I am very spiritual and I don't apologize for the anointing that is on my life to minister to people. I am giving and loving unapologetically. Some of the same traits that can draw a person to me can be the same ones that push them away. I am ALL of those things and so much more.
But I was an insecure and hurt woman who was too clingy and too needy even though I was a lot of wonderful things as well. It took some time for me to really understand all of those things about myself and decide what I needed to work on because I wanted to be better and not to keep or get a man. The man that I dated during that time went through a lot of changes with me that I couldn't appreciate at the time, but looking back I saw that I would have gotten on my nerves so I understood me getting on his. I didn't change to keep him or to get him. He was never one of my four husbands, but I have always and will always love him because I learned so much through the good and bad of our relationship. But I knew a change was gonna come and it did.
I changed because I wanted to be better, whole, and complete. I continue to change so that I am in a constant state of becoming better, wiser, and stronger. A change is gonna come because it has to come. It has to come because I refuse to be the me of 2010 in 2011. I was good but I must be gooder. If you believe that a change is gonna come, then make sure that it does by doing what YOU have to DO! Reflect, examine, adjust, and improve. A change is gonna come, oh yes it is, but you have to do the work!
For more timeless lessons and endless wisdom, visit http://www.drveronicaglass.com/and purchase your copy of Use Your Buckets: Twelve Life Lessons for Success. This book was featured on The Balancing Act on Lifetime. See the interview on national television on January 5th @6 am CST/7am EST. Share this information with a friend and follow the blog that is changing people's lives by changing their perspectives!
Changing Daily,
Dr. VG
You see, I learned a long time ago that everyone in your life can teach you something. They don't have to get it all right to help you learn lessons. In fact, some of the best and most life-changing lessons that you will ever learn will come from people who got it the most wrong. Sounds crazy, right? But think about it. If your parents really messed up when they were raising you, then you learned what type of parents you didn't want to be. It was through really bad relationships that you learned what you didn't want in a partner,how you didn't want to be treated, and how you didn't want to treat someone else. That in and of itself is half of the battle.
Next, if you are really honest with yourself, there were some things you learned about yourself that YOU needed to change to be better. I can be honest about my flaws and shortcomings and believe me I have had them and still have some but some I have corrected. Listen, when guys try to talk to me I understand some things. First, I understand that they are often drawn by my physical appearance. I may not be Halle Berry but I definitely am not Celie from the Color Purple (no slight to my sister Whoopi). I know that the physical can change. You can gain or lose weight. Your hair can break off or grow long. Or you can suffer from an illness that destroys your physical appearance. If that's why they're with you, then when it changes they will leave you.
So before they get all caught up in my beauty and the booty, I have to let them know some things. I am a mother of seven. I am very active and industrious. I am strong-willed and determined. I can submit to headship but I refuse to submit again to a man whose headship I can not respect. I am spoiled. Yes, I said it. I am spoiled, but I also love to spoil my man. I don't take a long time to make decisions nor to act on my decisions. I am very spiritual and I don't apologize for the anointing that is on my life to minister to people. I am giving and loving unapologetically. Some of the same traits that can draw a person to me can be the same ones that push them away. I am ALL of those things and so much more.
But I was an insecure and hurt woman who was too clingy and too needy even though I was a lot of wonderful things as well. It took some time for me to really understand all of those things about myself and decide what I needed to work on because I wanted to be better and not to keep or get a man. The man that I dated during that time went through a lot of changes with me that I couldn't appreciate at the time, but looking back I saw that I would have gotten on my nerves so I understood me getting on his. I didn't change to keep him or to get him. He was never one of my four husbands, but I have always and will always love him because I learned so much through the good and bad of our relationship. But I knew a change was gonna come and it did.
I changed because I wanted to be better, whole, and complete. I continue to change so that I am in a constant state of becoming better, wiser, and stronger. A change is gonna come because it has to come. It has to come because I refuse to be the me of 2010 in 2011. I was good but I must be gooder. If you believe that a change is gonna come, then make sure that it does by doing what YOU have to DO! Reflect, examine, adjust, and improve. A change is gonna come, oh yes it is, but you have to do the work!
For more timeless lessons and endless wisdom, visit http://www.drveronicaglass.com/and purchase your copy of Use Your Buckets: Twelve Life Lessons for Success. This book was featured on The Balancing Act on Lifetime. See the interview on national television on January 5th @6 am CST/7am EST. Share this information with a friend and follow the blog that is changing people's lives by changing their perspectives!
Changing Daily,
Dr. VG
Sunday, January 2, 2011
The Dawning of a New Day
It is the dawning of a new day. A day we have never seen and won't ever see again and it is our responsibility to make it the best day ever. You may be saying, "But Dr. VG you just don't know what I am dealing with." And you are absolutely correct I don't know the specifics of what you are dealing with. But it really doesn't matter because we are ALL dealing with things that others don't know about. So what!
To begin your new day start with no excuses. I'm not saying that you don't acknowledge what's going on in your life but you acknowledge it address it and keep it moving! Yes, I said it! Keep it moving! You have to have a no-nonsense approach to your life that keeps you moving forward even when you are still. When you find yourself still, then you have to use that time to THINK. Think about your choices, your decisions, your consequences, and your desired results. Think about what you've done, what you do, what you need to do, and what you will do.
Now that you've gotten rid of excuses and you have thought about what to do, you have to create a plan. Plan your next steps, next moves, next actions. Plan but don't get caught up in the planning because you will get paralyzed in the planning and never enact anything.
Next, you want to act on your plan. Do what you have to do. Step by step by step! Move! And keep moving until you look up and you have accomplished your goal. But it is not over when you accomplish your goal, because you have to CELEBRATE!
Celebrate your victories. Celebrate meeting your goals on your way to your larger goal. Celebrate your stick-to-itness when you stick to your plan. But don't get stuck celebrating because now you have new goals to set and heights to climb.
It is this continual process that keeps us alive and thriving. Never stop until the new days stop coming. Each dawn of a new day is a new opportunity to achieve greatness. Enjoy each new day and never take them for granted. You never know what is going to happen in this new day. So refuse to miss it by not engaging the day. Engage full on and watch God bless your engagement in the dawning of a new day! Enjoy!
For more timeless lessons and endless wisdom, visit http://www.drveronicaglass.com/ and purchase your copy of Use Your Buckets: Twelve Life Lessons for Success. This book was featured on The Balancing Act on Lifetime. See the interview on national television on January 5th @6 am CST/7am EST. Share this information with a friend and follow the blog that is changing people's lives by changing their perspectives!
Engaged in my new day,
Dr. VG
To begin your new day start with no excuses. I'm not saying that you don't acknowledge what's going on in your life but you acknowledge it address it and keep it moving! Yes, I said it! Keep it moving! You have to have a no-nonsense approach to your life that keeps you moving forward even when you are still. When you find yourself still, then you have to use that time to THINK. Think about your choices, your decisions, your consequences, and your desired results. Think about what you've done, what you do, what you need to do, and what you will do.
Now that you've gotten rid of excuses and you have thought about what to do, you have to create a plan. Plan your next steps, next moves, next actions. Plan but don't get caught up in the planning because you will get paralyzed in the planning and never enact anything.
Next, you want to act on your plan. Do what you have to do. Step by step by step! Move! And keep moving until you look up and you have accomplished your goal. But it is not over when you accomplish your goal, because you have to CELEBRATE!
Celebrate your victories. Celebrate meeting your goals on your way to your larger goal. Celebrate your stick-to-itness when you stick to your plan. But don't get stuck celebrating because now you have new goals to set and heights to climb.
It is this continual process that keeps us alive and thriving. Never stop until the new days stop coming. Each dawn of a new day is a new opportunity to achieve greatness. Enjoy each new day and never take them for granted. You never know what is going to happen in this new day. So refuse to miss it by not engaging the day. Engage full on and watch God bless your engagement in the dawning of a new day! Enjoy!
For more timeless lessons and endless wisdom, visit http://www.drveronicaglass.com/ and purchase your copy of Use Your Buckets: Twelve Life Lessons for Success. This book was featured on The Balancing Act on Lifetime. See the interview on national television on January 5th @6 am CST/7am EST. Share this information with a friend and follow the blog that is changing people's lives by changing their perspectives!
Engaged in my new day,
Dr. VG
Saturday, January 1, 2011
A New Year and an Empty Bucket
We have rolled into 2011 and it is truly a NEW year! We can choose to start the year out with an empty bucket which is really a blessing to most of us whether we know it or not. We get to let go of all of the junk, foolishness, and mess of 2010 by simply "dumping our bucket" so we can move into the new year with an empty bucket! Yes, an empty bucket! Some of you are cringing at the thought of having anything EMPTY but guess what! I have some good news for you. Lesson 1 of Use Your Buckets: Twelve Life Lessons for Success states that "an empty bucket is full of possibilities."
Let's not look at emptiness as a negative but as an opportunity to fill your buckets with WHAT and WHO you want. Check this out. Imagine how you want your year to end in 2011. Let's start there at the end and work our way backwards so that we know what and who to put in our bucket to make that reality exist by the end of this year. A good friend and mentor of mine has been telling me for a while to start with the end in mind and work backwards. Being as stubborn and hard-headed as I can be, I have not done that heretofor. However, 2011 gives me the opportunity to do just that...decide what I want in the end and write my script for it by filling my bucket selectively.
The challenge in this approach is that it forces us to really THINK about what it is we want and sometimes we don't want to say it for fear that we won't get it. Let's get that out of the way now. So what if you don't get it all. What if the worst case scenario is that you get half of what you are shooting for in 2011. That's 50% more of what you want than you had when the year began today. So do you really LOSE anything if you don't get it all. Not at all. But FEAR tries to convince us not to dream, set goals, and work towards them because we might FAIL.
Let's break this all down. FEAR is simply False Evidence Appearing Real. It is not real, it just seems real. It is a mirage, an illusion. You see the danger with mirages lie in how we respond to them. In a desert if you see a mirage of water, then you will go scoop it up and try to drink it only to discover that it is sand. Now you are choking on sand because you allowed the mirage to dictate your actions. We can't let what we see with the natural eyes determine our behavior. Instead our behavior has to be determined by our goal.
The next problem is the belief that we will FAIL (Flawlessly Ascend in Life)! Let me FAIL when that is what it means. I believe that most people who fear failure really fear success or flawlessly ascending in life and then are mad at or jealous of those people who do ascend. This year we have to make some decisions. We've been given gifts and talents so don't be afraid to use them to the fullest. People who can't handle them don't deserve your time or your attention. FOCUS on those people who can embrace who you are and you CLICK.
Hear me clearly. There will be people who will be in your life but don't have to be IN your life. In 2011 be wise in who you let IN your INNER circle because everyone does not deserve to be there or belong there. Here is a barometer to help you determine who goes IN and who goes OUT. If your conversations and/or time with that person creates emotional turmoil or drama, then they go OUT. If you find yourself OUT, then understand that it just means that there is something about your dynamic that does not CLICK in a healthy way with that person and revamp how you view the relationship. Another barometer is the person's presence has the ability to significantly alter your mood or mindset, then that person's role in your life needs to change because NO ONE should have that kind of power over you and your mood.
Again let me just be real, sometimes we inappropriately put people IN places and roles in our lives that they can not fulfill at all. Accept that reality and let them go or shift the nature of the relationship in order to salvage it. You have to control what is going on in your life because if you don't, then what is going on in your life will control you. Your mental, physical, and spiritual health are not worth the sacrifice. And if I'm one of those people in your life, I am not mad at you because you are probably one of those people in my life. Let's position ourselves to live happily ever NOW in 2011, because 2010 is gone and we can't get any of it back. However, we do have an empty bucket for 2011 waiting for US to decide what and who to put in it because it is full of possibilities.
For more endless wisdom and timeless lessons, visit http://www.drveronicaglass.com/ and purchase your copy of Use Your Buckets: Twelve Life Lessons for Success. This book was featured on The Balancing Act on Lifetime. See the interview on national television on January 5th @6 am CST/7am EST. Share this information with a friend and follow the blog that is changing people's lives by changing their perspectives!
Expectantly,
Dr. VG
Let's not look at emptiness as a negative but as an opportunity to fill your buckets with WHAT and WHO you want. Check this out. Imagine how you want your year to end in 2011. Let's start there at the end and work our way backwards so that we know what and who to put in our bucket to make that reality exist by the end of this year. A good friend and mentor of mine has been telling me for a while to start with the end in mind and work backwards. Being as stubborn and hard-headed as I can be, I have not done that heretofor. However, 2011 gives me the opportunity to do just that...decide what I want in the end and write my script for it by filling my bucket selectively.
The challenge in this approach is that it forces us to really THINK about what it is we want and sometimes we don't want to say it for fear that we won't get it. Let's get that out of the way now. So what if you don't get it all. What if the worst case scenario is that you get half of what you are shooting for in 2011. That's 50% more of what you want than you had when the year began today. So do you really LOSE anything if you don't get it all. Not at all. But FEAR tries to convince us not to dream, set goals, and work towards them because we might FAIL.
Let's break this all down. FEAR is simply False Evidence Appearing Real. It is not real, it just seems real. It is a mirage, an illusion. You see the danger with mirages lie in how we respond to them. In a desert if you see a mirage of water, then you will go scoop it up and try to drink it only to discover that it is sand. Now you are choking on sand because you allowed the mirage to dictate your actions. We can't let what we see with the natural eyes determine our behavior. Instead our behavior has to be determined by our goal.
The next problem is the belief that we will FAIL (Flawlessly Ascend in Life)! Let me FAIL when that is what it means. I believe that most people who fear failure really fear success or flawlessly ascending in life and then are mad at or jealous of those people who do ascend. This year we have to make some decisions. We've been given gifts and talents so don't be afraid to use them to the fullest. People who can't handle them don't deserve your time or your attention. FOCUS on those people who can embrace who you are and you CLICK.
Hear me clearly. There will be people who will be in your life but don't have to be IN your life. In 2011 be wise in who you let IN your INNER circle because everyone does not deserve to be there or belong there. Here is a barometer to help you determine who goes IN and who goes OUT. If your conversations and/or time with that person creates emotional turmoil or drama, then they go OUT. If you find yourself OUT, then understand that it just means that there is something about your dynamic that does not CLICK in a healthy way with that person and revamp how you view the relationship. Another barometer is the person's presence has the ability to significantly alter your mood or mindset, then that person's role in your life needs to change because NO ONE should have that kind of power over you and your mood.
Again let me just be real, sometimes we inappropriately put people IN places and roles in our lives that they can not fulfill at all. Accept that reality and let them go or shift the nature of the relationship in order to salvage it. You have to control what is going on in your life because if you don't, then what is going on in your life will control you. Your mental, physical, and spiritual health are not worth the sacrifice. And if I'm one of those people in your life, I am not mad at you because you are probably one of those people in my life. Let's position ourselves to live happily ever NOW in 2011, because 2010 is gone and we can't get any of it back. However, we do have an empty bucket for 2011 waiting for US to decide what and who to put in it because it is full of possibilities.
For more endless wisdom and timeless lessons, visit http://www.drveronicaglass.com/ and purchase your copy of Use Your Buckets: Twelve Life Lessons for Success. This book was featured on The Balancing Act on Lifetime. See the interview on national television on January 5th @6 am CST/7am EST. Share this information with a friend and follow the blog that is changing people's lives by changing their perspectives!
Expectantly,
Dr. VG
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